Dec 22, 2011
A White Horse for Christmas? Yes please.
I’ve mentioned before that music was unspeakably healing to me in the first months and years of grief after the death of our daughter.
For some reason, Christmas compels me to share a couple. Maybe it’s because there’s so much frickin’ happiness at Christmas, and I remember feeling so desperately unhappy those first couple Christmases. I remember getting the album Snow Angels at Christmas time in 2007, our first one without Felicity.
I have particular memories of playing–no, blasting–this one over and over with tears streaming down my face anytime I was in the car alone.
I don’t want to explicate why it was so comforting to me. That’s not how music works. If it grabs you, it grabs you. If it doesn’t, then no amount of my explaining it will help you feel what I feel when I hear it. It punches me in the gut still today, in the best kind of gut-punching way.
Don’t forget to pray this week for people shedding more tears this Christmas than sharing smiles. Remember them. Listen to a song for them. Light a candle for them. If they can’t ask for the white horse for Christmas for themselves, hold out hope for them and ask for it for them.
White Horse
(Words and Music: Detweiler)Bring me a white horse for Christmas
We’ll ride him through the town
Out into the snowy woods
Where we will both lie downUnderneath white birches
Our faces toward the sky
We will make snow angels
With our white horse standing byHush now baby
One day we’re gonna ride
Hush now baby
Our white horse through the skyBring me a white horse for Christmas
We’ll ride him through the snow
All the way to Bethlehem
2000 years agoI wanna speak with the angel
Who said do not be afraid
I wanna kneel where the oxen knelt
Where the little child was laidHush now baby
One day you’re gonna ride
Hush now baby
Your white horse through the skyNo bridle will he be wearing
His unshod hoofs they will fly
Keep a watch out this Christmas
For that white horse in the skyHush now baby
One day we’re gonna ride
Hush now baby
Our white horse through the skyHush now baby
Let every angel sing
Hush now baby
One day we’ll ride again
That’s a beautiful song Molly. There is one by Karen Carpenter called “Merry Christmas Darling” that still gets to me, even 16 Christmases later. I still cry my eyes out. It’s meant, I’m sure, for a boyfriend that can’t be there for Christmas, but the words are very fitting for my missing daughter, and that’s the way I listen to it. I just commented on my Facebook today that nothing helps a heavy heart like Scripture and MUSIC…I love it… Thanks for posting this…
There is such a delicate sweetness to this song. Thanks for sharing it.
molly,
thank you for sharing this post and for reaching out to those who are hurting this Christmas. you struck a cord with me when you said that music was unspeakably healing to you after losing your daughter. i am in that place right now, and music is like balm to my soul. i lost my dad (only 62) just 8 short weeks ago after a 9 year journey through alzheimers. so really, i have been losing him for 9 long years, but when he died on oct.28th, i lost the one part of him that i had still been able to hang on to:his physical body. though he no longer knew me, couldn’t talk, and just stared off into space, holding his hand became my lifeline to him. and now he’s gone. i know he’s in heaven and i am so happy for him that he’s finally free, but i miss him so badly it hurts. i knew i’d be sad when he finally died, however, i had no idea it would affect every aspect of my life.
i try reading the Word and i am numb. i listen to sermons and i am numb. but music is a different story. a dear friend recently gave me matt redmans new cd 10000 Reasons, and that cd is like balm to my broken heart. i basically cry through most of the songs, but i feel the healing, if that makes sense it helped me to hear you say that music was healing to you…i thought maybe something was wrong with me for only being able to “feel” through music.
sorry for the long response, but i just had to share with you how much you blessed me. i am praying for you this Christmas and i enjoy your blog so much!
Wow. Thanks. God led me to you.
ahhh. I’ve been listening to this today and printed off the words this afternoon so I could sing it to myself. It touches my hurting heart very deeply, too. One day we’ll ride again. I hope so.
Oh Molly, you’re an OtR fan? I am in love with your blog all over again.
I am so sorry for your loss. Over The Rhine has been with me through the loss of two babies among so much else and I understand your words deeply.
They are the soundtrack of my life, truly.